I’m sure that I’ve read it and I was definitely aware somewhere deep in my brain, but nothing prepares you for the hard stop of existing your current career for a life of free time.

I’m two weeks into early retirement and I can tell you for sure that it can be a very, very unsettling place to navigate. There’s a profound sense of loss that will need to be unpacked which I think will take some time. Suddenly there’s no clock to keep track of, no meetings to attend, no questions, no business problems to solve, no sense of place.

For the last 10 years I have saved like a woman possessed to have enough to retire and in late November 2025 I finally decided that it was time to build something new. Where work was optional, and there was a moment of clarity that there must be more to more to life than working myself to death. So two weeks ago, after what felt like the longest notice period I finally signed out of my work email for the last time, handed over my role to the new staff and said goodbye to my team mates.

This moment of change of identity has been massive and even though I have been longing to create this space and live a life outside of the traditional working model… you know the one where we work til we retire at 67, take the government pension, convert our superannuation and march off into the sunset wearing white linen as we walk hand in hand on the beach.

Errrr no, it’s not like that at all. And certainly not when you retire earlier than most and your life partner is still working the nine to five. The silence…. oh! the silence.

There is so much talk about retirement when you’re 67, but not very much about those of us, especially women who retire earlier and fund our lives themselves. It’s either the crowd in their 30’s and 40’s who are deep in the FIRE movement or retirees in their late 60’s but not much in between. What about us, the fortunate few who have decided to retire into life , the one that we worked so hard for and gained back what are the best years of what we have to come ? So here I shall write and hope it helps others take the plunge and back themselves to walk away from the grind and walk Retire into their life. It was such an abstract to consider leaving my 9-5 job and now that I’ve actually done it, even more so.

I know that I’m incredibly fortunate to have enough for a modest life where time holds the greatest value and all of that time is mine. Where I can write, cook every day and find my creative voice in all things, that’s been smothered by a mind too busy to find a calm thought to save myself. Along with heading to the local coffee shop and settling in for a couple of hours surrounded by others and yet still in my own bubble. This my friend, is delicious!

It’s not lost on me that most of my peers aren’t in the same financial situation as I am and will continue to work in order to fund their life and/or fill their time. I’m grateful that I sat with mapping out a framework for future me all those years ago and here I sit in this moment trying to enjoy it for what it is. But there’s not many of us and certainly not in my circle, so I’m flying solo with the internet and my library of books to guide me. I did reach out to Rach Taylor back in December before I pulled the pin. She is a transition coach, mostly working with ex athletes ( certainly not me!… I snuck in the side door) and she’s given me a safe place to land for a while as I ’m navigating the big leap away from my career and into a yet undiscovered life.

What all my reading on the subject told me about the early days of retirement is how the unstructured days feel for want of a better word… untethered. This might actually be a good thing ( thought I’m yet to be convinced) knowing that this moment is exactly where I should be. There will be more doors that open for all sorts of opportunities down the track that will I will try out. Some might go nowhere and others might really light a fire but not just yet. It’s time right now, to be where I am, breathe and take it all in.

So I’m going to sit with it for a while, not rush into the next busy thing and take away from this VERY uncomfortable silence of what is now my life. Micah is still working and will be for a few more years, so it’s just me and the dog right now, clunking around in this big old house.

This is what I’m reading right now. THE RETIREMENT YOU DIDN’T SEE COMING by Dan Haylett ( I’ve re-read it probably 3 times over the last month or so-Note: I purchased it from the UK directly as it’s not available locally here in AUS) and YOU’VE GOT MONEY NOW WHAT by Dave Gow.

I’ve been listening to Dave Gow on his podcast STRONG MONEY and whilst he is a good 20 years younger than I, there’s still a lot I’ve learnt from him as I navigate this early retirement gig!

For the last month I have been deep into a mini retirement. Stepping in to what it would actually feel like if I stepped away from my full time job. It’s been eye opening that’s for sure. Both with the freedom to tap into some quiet time , not having to get up at the crack of dawn and slowing down from the hustle of work.

It took the first 2 weeks to decompress to some extent though I’m sure a full recovery will take much longer. My blood pressure dropped, the daily headaches disappeared and I actually had bandwidth to think about aspects of my own life, rather than my head being so full of work that I couldn’t think of anything else.

I’ve spent most of the month just thinking about what I want for myself and with my 60th birthday fast approaching, the moment is here to pull the pin now that I have enough saved to fund my life. Both my superannuation and small savings pool have given me the runway to enjoy a different kind of life. It’s not a grand amount, but enough for a modest lifestyle by my standards. That also gives me back a fair chunk of free time.

But here’s the thing…. What comes to the surface is uncertainty of change which steps into my brain as fear and I need to unpack that because it holds me frozen in my thoughts. It’s my biggest weakness. I think too much. I know though that the cure is action, to get moving and put one step in front of the other. If I build a different kind of life I can mould it without the need to earn a dollar to fund it. What does a life look like when work is optional?

I’ve finally reached my “enough figure” and now I’m focussed on the value of “time”. I’ve been grappling with how to focus on actually being in alignment with it and understanding that is why I have been feeling out of sorts for the longest time. I just started getting annoyed with myself and I know that Micah, my partner must be too. I talk about building a new life ALL….THE…TIME . It’s time to stop thinking and get into the action of doing. Getting back every day to fill it with purpose, people, health and personal growth.

I’ve been blessed with a job that provided me with a good income and always had a plan to work to 65, but a recent heart scare which gave me a fright reminded me that I’m not invincible and my ability to bounce back is not what it once was. No exercise for years and my work sitting for the last 10 years seated at a desk. I shouldn’t be surprised that I was ripe for all the age related illnesses that can rear their head in our stage of life. Living in snipers alley so to speak, and all lifestyle related.

Can I undo the damage? There’s only one way to find out.

So what would retirement look like?

This is what I’ve figured out would be a good starting point for me.

Daily health: 6-9: walking in the morning with Toast to start moving again. Quality breakfast full of protein to start the day and personal time to quiet my mind. Personal care and plenty of water.

Purpose: 9-1: of meaningful work each day. Whether that is writing, filming the journey and building a small business to keep engaged with the outside world with people I enjoy the company of. 1 - 2 days a week of work if it popped up but only if it’s aligned with my life.

Personal Growth: Spending time in the kitchen and the garden creating a beautiful space to live in. The house deserves some love and my own desire to live a more healthful life deserves focus. I know what to do, years in the gym in my previous life, culinary trained with no excuses. Hundreds of cookbooks with enough cooking equipment to sink a ship.

People: Spending the evening with Micah, the boys and my community, engaged rather than exhausted, providing great food for the table, conversation and the freedom that a lifetime of saving have given me to enjoy the value of time.

These are the good years and I don’t want to miss a thing.

And so this new chapter of my life begins after my final few weeks of my full time job and I finally get to feel like what it is to be in my full time life. The gift to myself of lots of time to experience all that I’ve worked so hard to experience.

2026 is going to be a great year.

When I was first single again in my 50’s after 20 years marriage, it came as a shock. Not only that all the choices on how I would live were mine but also how limited my thinking was. I didn’t know what I didn’t know.

Though the choice was mine to start over, the safety and security of having a partner to come home to every night had become so ingrained that I couldn’t see beyond it. The quietness of the house, the stillness was uncomfortable. Coming from a very traditional family makeup, I had NEVER considered living alone, intentionally. Leaving my marriage was the biggest leap of faith and into the unknown. Like Wendy on the plank, waiting for the alligators below in Peter Pan, I needed a whole lot of faith.

And honest to God, my new night time company of the silence, sadness and its offsider loneliness dragged behind me like an anchor. “Hi sad, it’s you again. Yes still here with loneliness your sidekick. He’s been company for too long and I’d like to share time with happiness. I’ve been too sad, for too long!

Yes, the kids would come and go for a while when they were growing up, but mostly it was just me, on my own…and in my head!

And then….. my friend, the penny dropped.

I actually enjoyed the stillness when I came home and it began to balance out the busyness of my work day. Stillness, quiet moments, a cup of tea, a candle lit. I became quiet in my own head again and I’m not going to lie, having the whole bed to myself made sleeping way, way easier. Small pleasures, and they came thick and fast. I had been waiting for 20 years of giving and constant noise, unable to think for a moment and here I was!

I started to read a lot, no surprises there! And found a couple of great books where other women were doing it too. Not because they had to, but because they chose to. Jane Matthews “Living Alone and Loving it” and Alannah Hill “Handbag of Happiness” are crackers. Australian authors shouting from the rooftops how living on your own can be a choice worth choosing. I love to read and when there’s nothing but time, it’s become a love of mine.

And so I began loving my single life, closing off the world at the end of the work day in my little townhouse, just me and my little dog Annie. The quiet, the stillness and the peace were all I needed to find myself again. For a really long time I protected this little sanctuary away from the world where I could heal from the busy world and the demands that it made of me.

I think when we leave a long relationship and being a part of a couple for many years, we lose ourselves in the process. Not always, but sometimes! No longer are we individuals, but a sum of the parts of the relationship.

Mother, wife, employee, friend, but never myself and after 20 years I had no sense of identity other than being of service to everybody else. On my own, the shadows started to lift, I was able to rely on myself again and figure out what I wanted in life.

I’ve taken a particular view not shared by many, that we all should spend a fair chunk of time on our own after a long relationship to realign again and come back to ourselves. Yes, its uncomfortable and yes the silence is deafening but thats a good thing.

For the record I spent 4 years on my own before dating again and another 5 years living apart together. There will be another post about what that entails and how to navigate an alternate path whilst keeping your space protected. Super unconventional but I was resolute. My home = my space.

I think it makes us better people. New relationships can grow in their own good time. Nothing is rushed or forced and as a woman who made the choice to exit, I knew that I would be confident in my ability to know when to enter something new. I can tell you for sure that it makes date night have far more weight when you haven’t seen each other all week. We enjoy each others company over dinner and wine and the conversations flows.

As the years passed and my confidence returned that living together might be an option for us both, we found a home together that satisfied my need for being alone and his for us to live together. A big old house in the hills that we can rattle around together in. A home for my books and space for me to be really quiet, living in the clouds of my thoughts. And a place to write again. Happiness is back and she’s been lost for a really long time.

Thank you for finding me here, I feel like I’m amongst friends.

Kerry xx

Future me waits for the gifts of good health, great relationships with family and friends and financial security for the big life ahead.

I’ve got plans, big plans, so whether it's the one year older version of me, or the 5 year wiser self, sending myself some love and the gifts that I need for a greater life than I’ve allowed so far.

It’s so easy to sit back and watch the years roll by. Six years ago I stopped training, my nutrition fell away and in the depths of a hidden despair I retreated into myself. Illness found me and it might take a hot minute to find the healthier, fitter version of myself that I left behind. Finding a way out has been the hardest thing to acknowledge. Its such a silent killer, stepping away from our own needs, filling up those of others and when all is said and done, a lesser version of myself is what remains. ( but not for much longer I might also say!)

If I had my time over again, I would have slowed down and processed it all, maybe even stopped work for a while, but I didn’t. I plowed on, as we are often to do, ignored the signs and tested the boundaries of my own mental and physical health. Six years of insomnia, inactivity and overwork. My brain literally screamed out to me and my body has paid a high price. Today I start over and leave behind my own midlife pause.

Over the past few years life has shown me that time is our greatest gift. More isn't promised and yesterday will never be again. Creating a manifesto of my own feels right. Without, like I’m in a boat without a captain and chance is a terrible navigator for me.

So I begin again to write, share the lessons I’ve learnt, the great books I’ve read and my plan for my own midlife and beyond. It seems like as I get closer to another decade milestone I search for answers. I’ve read a lot, almost 1000 books over the last 15 years, most of which I still have in my library. A place I retreat to when I’m tired, seeking solitude and the promise of silence. It was a must to have a place in my new home for all my books, a desk to write from and a view to take in the quiet weight of silence.

This week I’ve been reading “The Purpose Code by Jordan Grumet” after listening to him speak on a podcast. Looking ahead all the possibilities on the other side of my working life but without a plan feels delicious in the freedom and salty without the focus of a full time job.

I’ve been thinking big lately, mostly from my conversations with Terry Condon from a money mentorship program I’ve been invested in, but again with this book, the same themes came up. I promise to spill the beans on what I’ve learnt from the program so far in another post for you.

Here’s what keeps coming up….

What are your biggest regrets?

What are you proudest of?

Are there any unfulfilled dreams that were left behind?

What feels like it’s missing?

Where do you want to go?

Thought provoking questions deserving big reflection and asking what I actually want from life. Having choices and making plans for big dreams to be put into action. And actually get moving, which is a challenge with only 7 days in the week. I often spend so much time thinking, I forget to get into the doing of it all.

Looking ahead to the big Six O and counting months beyond into having more time for myself finally, finding my purpose rather than someone else’s having been a life long people pleaser is a big step forward. Time, there it is! I’ve been trading it for all things that money can buy over many many years but the biggest wealth is time for the things you enjoy.

The frameworks I’ve found between the pages of all these books I’ve read, from philosophy, psychology, financial management, nutrition, medicine, my mind is a mash up of it all. I’ve found a way forward to create yet another iteration of myself, perhaps a little kinder, more reflective and just a little more focused for the future and what lies ahead. Less them, more me perhaps.

I encourage you to find a moment to think about your own life, define future plans and get about moving forward to what fills you up. Small steps bring big results. This I know to be true. Oh, and stop people pleasing and say NO more often! We will talk some more about that too!!

Time for me to get in front of the camera and the microphone rather than behind and speak my truth. Women in their 50’s and 60’s can almost be invisible and I’d like to change that. To let go of my own imposter syndrome and step out from the darkness of what has been a really shitty block of time.

Imagine 5 years from now and where you will be. I've lived on this earth for over 20,000 days ( thanks for the reminder Oliver Burkeman!) and I won't waste another year putting off what I know I should do today.

Kerry XO

Mission "Midlife Manifesto" is officially in motion - because let's face it, Prince Charming isn't showing up with a retirement plan. Over the past 10 years I've been planning for future me and trading today so that I can live tomorrow. This my friends, has got to change. Time to channel my inner financial superhero and make that nest egg work for me.

Let's be real - us fabulous fifties ladies are walking a financial tightrope. With the economy doing its best impression of a mood swing, we've got to be our own money managers. No pressure, right? Truth be known, I've been squirrelling away extra into my superannuation for years, even when money was tight and it's made a HUGE difference in what I have now.

Thanks to the Australian Government, ( God bless you!) for the tax savings when I salary sacrificed into my super fund, the compound effect and a skyrocketing share market over the last several years, has nudged my superannuation to a figure that will allow me to retire when I'm 60 if I choose to and not have to worry about working again. Maybe I will, maybe I won't. Most likely I will get bored, but the opportunity to spend as long as I want writing, thinking and relaxing is like gold!

If you'd told me even 10 years ago that I would gain back at least 5 years of free time I wouldn't have believed you. I was sure I'd have to work til I was 65 at least, maybe longer as a single woman. I wanted to be financially independent as a single woman no matter what the future held. And here we are!

This year I'm at it again. Investing in myself and figuring out what matters most. Next week I will fill you in with what I've been up to and who I've brought into my team of mentors. Talented people shining a light for me on my blind spots and pushing me ahead to take the leap to live a bigger life. Go large or go home I say!

The grand plan? Simple! Spend big on what makes my heart sing and keep those purse strings tight on everything else. Think less "random impulse purchases" and more "intentional living" - because apparently, that's what grown-ups do! With the big Six O shortly making an appearance, it’s best time to sort out what’s important and what get’s the heave ho!

Here's to finding zen in the chaos, living in the moment, and finally figuring out where all those dollars have been sneaking off to. I will be sharing the numbers, with the goal posts set. 2025 plans are afoot, I've got big big plans , stepping outside of my comfort zone and taking back control of my life. I'm not sure where the last 10 years went, but I'm sure going to make the most of what lies ahead.

2025: The year of less shopping and more wisdom... with maybe just a tiny bit of shopping. Hey, we're getting wiser, not saints! 😉

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